At ICA Counselling and Supervision, we often say: trauma is not only what happened to you — it is what happened inside of you.
When many people think about trauma, they think about a specific event. A moment. Words that were said. Something frightening, threatening, or deeply painful. While those experiences matter, trauma is not just the event itself.
Trauma is also your nervous system’s response to that event.
It is how your body adapted to survive.
Trauma Is a Body Experience, Not Just a Memory
You may have heard the phrase from Bessel van der Kolk, author of The Body Keeps the Score. His work highlights something many trauma survivors already know intuitively:
The body remembers.
Even when you are not consciously thinking about a past experience, your body may still respond as though it is happening now.
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Tightness in your chest
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A lump in your throat
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Tension in your jaw or shoulders
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A racing heart
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Numbness or heaviness
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Digestive discomfort
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Sudden irritability or shutdown
These are not random. They are nervous system responses.
Your underlying physiological state — your body’s internal condition — shapes how you perceive the world. If your body feels unsafe, the world may feel unsafe. If your body is bracing for danger, you may experience ordinary interactions as threatening or overwhelming.
A Gentle Body Awareness Exercise
If you feel comfortable, you might try this short exercise:
Take a slow, steady breath.
If it feels safe, soften your gaze or close your eyes.
Bring to mind a moment when you felt:
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Unsafe
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Frightened
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Anxious
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Dismissed
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Provoked
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Devalued
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Defeated
Now pause.
Instead of replaying the event in detail, shift your attention to your body.
Scan slowly:
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Face (eyes, jaw, cheeks)
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Neck and shoulders
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Chest and stomach
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Arms and hands
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Back and pelvis
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Legs, ankles, and feet
Ask yourself:
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Where do I feel tension?
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Is there heaviness? Tingling? Tightness? Heat? Numbness?
Rather than pushing the sensation away, gently breathe through it. Acknowledge it. Notice it. Allow it.
You might:
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Hug yourself
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Wrap up in a blanket
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Hold a warm drink in both hands
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Splash cool water on your face
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Offer yourself a compassionate phrase
Continue breathing until the intensity shifts.
The goal is not to relive the trauma — it is to notice how it lives in your body and practice responding differently.
Trauma Symptoms Often Wear Disguises
Many people come to therapy believing their main issue is:
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Anger
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Emotional reactivity
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Controlling behaviours
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Hyper-independence
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Vengefulness
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Withdrawal
What they often discover is that these are adaptive responses to earlier experiences of threat, abandonment, or invalidation.
Your nervous system learned strategies to protect you.
At ICA, we do not pathologize survival strategies. We become curious about them.
The Nervous System and Connection
Your physiological state is communicated constantly:
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Through facial expressions
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Tone of voice
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Pace of speech
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Body posture
Healing is not only cognitive. It is relational and embodied.
To truly listen to someone is to go beyond their words and attune to their emotional tone. In therapy, we aim not only to hear your story — but to sense your nervous system state and co-create safety together.
When your body begins to feel safe in connection, new experiences become possible.
Expanding Your “Perception Box”
Trauma narrows reality.
It can create:
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Rigid expectations
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Black-and-white thinking
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Constant scanning for danger
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Limited emotional range
Healing expands reality.
It increases your ability to:
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Experience multiple emotions at once
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Stay present without shutting down
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Respond rather than react
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Feel safe in your body
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Connect without losing yourself
Healing is not about erasing the past.
It is about increasing your capacity to experience the present.
Trauma-Informed Healing at ICA Counselling & Supervision
At ICA Counselling & Supervision, our trauma-informed approach integrates:
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Nervous system awareness
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Cognitive and behavioural tools
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Emotion-focused interventions
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Mindfulness and grounding practices
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Cultural and identity-sensitive care
We recognize that trauma impacts the body, mind, relationships, and sense of identity. Our work supports individuals in developing embodied experiences that are different from trauma — experiences of safety, regulation, connection, and empowerment.
Trauma narrows reality.
Healing expands it.
If you are ready to begin expanding yours, we are here to support you.
Lauren Treleaven
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